Romance Done Spitefully
by Sushi Chi
Summary: How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Romance Done Spitefully**  
Author:** Sushi Chi (Ontinia on LJ)**  
Prompt:** 10 Things I Hate About You**  
Character/Pairing(s):** Jack/Ianto, Tosh/Tommy, Rhys/Gwen, Owen/Diane, Martha/Tom (past), Ianto/Lisa (past), Owen/Gwen (slight), Doctor, Donna, Rose**  
Rating:** PG 13**  
Warnings:** None**  
Spoilers: **Up to 'Last Man Standing'**  
Word Count:** 16458 (overall)**  
Summary:** How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways.**  
Disclaimer:** I do not own either Torchwood or 10 Things I Hate About You. I'm just borrowing them for the moment.**  
A/N:** I followed the script of the movie pretty well mainly because I actually think it's a rather brilliant script. But there are some changes in it. I do hope you all enjoy the story.  
Huge thanks to _GluttonousAnorexiaNervosa _who was my beta. She was awesome and delt with me getting paranoid about her being done with the beta in time.  
Done for the community Reel_TW on LJ.

Chapter One

Torchwood High is a large school, some of the kids called it the Wayne Manor of schools. Kids meet with their friends and talk about the weekend they just had, quickly finishing their homework, and some trying not to be noticed. Unknown to these kids is that there is a new one joining them.

Rhys Williams sat in the Guidance Councilor's office waiting for Ms. Noble to finish typing on her computer. Ms. Noble smiled at the screen and then turned to Rhys, "So, Rhys, here we go." She smiled and looked at his transcripts, "Nine schools in ten years. My, my Sunshine, that's a number. Army brat?"

Rhys was nodding, "Sorta, my dad's more in the-" he was cut off before he could say RAF.

"That's enough." Ms. Noble set the paper down, "I'm sure you won't find Torchwood any different than your old school." Rhys couldn't help but jump when something hit her window, "Same little asswipe shit-for-brains everywhere." She let out a loud laugh.

"Excuse me?" Rhys asked, worried, "Did you just say-? Am I in the right office?" He looked around worried.

"Not anymore you're not. I've got deviants to see and a novel to finish." Ms. Nobel said, "Run along now Sunshine."

Rhys nodded and quickly stood up. As he walked through the door he ran into a taller boy who was a little older than him. He had perfectly styled hair and some of the bluest eyes Rhys had ever seen. When the boy grinned Rhys was glad the sun wasn't coming in the window otherwise he might have been blinded.

Ms. Noble smiled to the boy who walked in as he winked at her, "Jack Harkness. I see we're making our visits a weekly ritual."

"Only so we can have these moments together, Donna." His grin widened some as his voice got a sort of purr to it, "Shall I hit the lights?"

"Oh very clever, American Boy." Donna picked up a different piece of paper, "Says here you exposed yourself in the cafeteria?"

Jack sighed, "I was joking with the lunch lady. It was a bratwurst."

"Bratwurst?" Donna looked him up and down, "Aren't we the optimist? Next time keep it in your pants. Okay?" She sat the paper down, "You can run along as well." After he left she went back to her computer, reading through her file - a racy romance novel she's been writing - as she adds the word 'bratwurst' to the sentence she was writing.

{{{{|

A Japanese girl saw Rhys and smiled at him, "Toshiko Sato. Tosh. I'm supposed to show you around."

"Oh, hi." Rhys sighed in relief, "Thank god. You know normally they send down on of those audio/visual geeks."

Tosh blinked, "I know what you mean." She idly wondered if that is what she really was. Shrugging she continued on, "So, Rhys. Here's the breakdown." She led him across the school grounds. "Over here are your basic beautiful people." she nodded her head to a group that were indeed very nice looking, "Now listen, unless they talk to you first, don't bother."

"But wait. Is that your rule or theirs?"

She gave a tight smile, "Watch this." She walked near one, "Hey there."

"Eat me."

She joined Rhys, "See that?" She continued walking through the crowd of kids, "To the left we have the Coffee Kids. Very edgy, don't make any sudden movements around them." They move on to a group kids dressed all in black with their faces painted white, "These are the-"

"Let me guess, Goths." Rhys said.

"They prefer Emo, but yes." Tosh nodded as they walked a bit farther, coming to a group of kids who were clearly smart, bent over text books. "These are the geniuses'." She smiled at them as one muttered something about 'Mary' and none-to-subtly shunned Tosh. When walking away Tosh sighed, "Yesterday they couldn't stop asking me questions."

"What happened?"

"Mary told them I had sex with her and stole her notes and that's how I knew all the answers." She sighed.

"So they believed her?"

"It's easy to believe the lies she tells are everything." Tosh answered. "But don't worry, they'll pay." After a second pause she went to continue, "Now, over here-"

"Oh my god." Rhys said, very distracted. "What group is she in?" Tosh followed his gaze to a girl with dark hair with large eyes, freckles and a gap in her teeth.

"The 'don't even think about it' group." Tosh sighed, "That's Gwen Jones. A sophomore."

"I burn! I pine! I perish!" Rhys said, not taking his eyes off her.

"Of course you do." Tosh sighed, "You know she's beautiful and deep. Pure."

The two walked closer and were able to hear Gwen talking with her friend, Diane, "Yep, see, there's a difference between 'like' and 'love'. Because I like my Sketchers but I love my Prada backpack."

Diane frowned, "But I love my Sketchers."

Gwen shrugged, "That's because you don't have a Prada backpack."

Diane grinned, "Ooh. Right."

Tosh took Rhys aside, "Look, forget about her. Incredibly uptight Step Mum. It's a widely known fact that the Jones kids aren't allowed to date."  
Rhys nodded, clearly not listening.

{{{|

A teacher sat on his desk, his hair standing up on end. The name plate on his desk which had once read 'John Smith' but had since been crossed out and now read simply, 'Doctor'. He glanced out at his bored looking class as he suddenly jumped off the desk, "So, so so so. What did everything think of _The Sun Also Rises?_"

A girl held up her hand and smiled when he nodded at her, "I loved it." Sighing, she continued, "It was so romantic."

A man wearing jeans with a waistcoat and tie rolled his eyes, "Romantic? Hemmingway? He was an alcoholic misogynist who squandered half his life hanging around Picasso trying to lay his leftovers."

A few seats over a guy, clearly popular, snorted. "As opposed to you, Ianto? A bitter self-righteous fag who has no friends?"

Ianto Jones turned and glared at him as a few giggles escaped the other students.

"Fingers to lips, Owen." The Doctor kept his gaze on Owen Harper until he complied and put a finger to his lips.

"Why can't we read something interesting? Like the _Count of Monte Cristo_? Or _The Canterbury Tales_? _The Scarlet Letter_? _Animal Farm_?" Ianto asked, doing his best to ignore Owen.

Jack suddenly stepped into the classroom, clearly late. Grinning he asked, "What'd I miss?"

"The fact that our education is lacking." Ianto replied, not turning around.

Jack nodded, "Good." He turned and walked back out.

The Doctor started to protest before realizing the youth would do as he wishes. He leaned back against his desk as conversation continued.

"Doctor," Owen started, "is there any way we can get Ianto to drink coffee before class?"

"Someday, Owen," The Doctor started, "you're gonna get kicked in the balls and I'm not going to do a thing to stop it." He turned to Ianto, "And Ianto, thank you for your point of view." Ianto nodded his head in thanks. The Doctor continued, "But you didn't raise your hand and started this small bicker fight so, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry but I've gotta send you to the office."

Ianto sighed and gathered his things before walking out. He stood in the doorway watching Donna write her romance novel, talking to herself.

"Undulating with desire, Donna removes her crimson cape...excitable, stiff and…" She sighed and looked up, surprised to see Ianto, "What's another word for engorged?"

"Tumescent?" Ianto suggested, taking a seat across from Donna's desk.

"Perfect!" Donna beamed as she typed and saved the document, "I hear you were terrorizing the Doctor's class again."

Ianto shrugged. "I don't see how expressing my opinion is a terrorist action."

Donna looked the boy over, "The same way you expressed your opinion to John Hart?" She paused, "The surgery to remove the stick from his arse went well, in case you're interested."

Ianto shrugged, "I still maintain that he put the stick there himself."

Donna sighed, she knew that John had called Ianto an Eye Candy and asked him what it felt like having a stick up his arse all the time to which Ianto somehow overpowered the other boy and stuck one up his, then said now he knew. "Ianto, people perceive you as-" she paused, unsure what to say.

"Apathetic?" Ianto supplied.

"'A cold robot' is the term used most often." Donna decided. Ianto seemed unaffected. "You might want to work on that."

Ianto nodded, getting up from his chair, "As always, thank you for your excellent guidance. I'll let you get back to Lee's quivering member."

As he left Donna's eyebrows rose, "Quivering member. I like that." She said to herself.

{{{|

Owen was talking to a friend when the friend saw Gwen and Diane walked by. Hitting Owen in on the arm, he said, "Virgin alert."

Owen turned and grinned at them. "Looking good, ladies."

They giggled and kept walking.

The friend rolled his eyes, "They're out of reach, even for you."

"No one's out of reach for me."

"You wanna put money on that?"

Owen smirked, "Money I've got, this I'm gonna do for fun."

Across the school grounds Toshiko and Rhys notice Owen staring at Gwen. Rhys couldn't help but bristle when he saw Owen, "Who's that guy?"

"That's Owen Harper. He's a jerk." Tosh paused, "And a model."

"He's a model?" Rhys looked down, thinking he couldn't compete with that. Not if the guy was a model.

"A model." Tosh nodded, "Mostly regional stuff. But he's rumored to have a tube sock ad coming out."

Rhys snorted, "Really?"

Tosh smirked, "Really." The amusement was clear in her tone. The two shared a laugh before Rhys turned his attention back to Gwen.

"Tosh, look at her. Is she always so-"

"-Vapid?" Tosh supplied.

"How can you say that? She's totally-" Rhys defended.

"-Conceited?" Tosh asked again.

"What are you talking about?" Tosh rolled her eyes, "There's more to her than you think. I mean, look. Just look at the way she smiles with that cute little gap in her teeth." He ignored Tosh's mutters something about it not being little. "And look at her eyes. She's totally pure. I mean, you just can't see what's there."

Tosh glanced again at Gwen but remained unconvinced, "No, Rhys. No. What's there is a Princess who wears a strategically planned sundress to convince guys like you to realize that you can never touch her and guys like him," she motioned over to Owen, "realize that they want to. She, my friend, is what you will spend the rest of your life not having." She patted him on the shoulder in a consoling manner.

"No." Rhys protested.

"Move on." Tosh really wished he'd listen to her, he couldn't get stuck on someone like Gwen, it would only end in heartbreak.

"No, you're wrong about her."

"Alright. I'm wrong?" Tosh shrugged, "You wanna take a shot? Be my guest. She's actually looking for a French Tudor."

Rhys grinned, "You're serious! That's perfect!"

"Do you speak French?" Tosh really shouldn't be too surprised by the fact, it was a large school and he had moved around a lot-

"Well no. But I will."

{{{|

Classes were over and all the students were racing to their cars so they could escape. Ianto and his friend Tommy were walking to Ianto's car when Owen appeared in his red sports car, "Hey Jeeves, you going for the teaboy look?"

Ianto rolled his eyes, "Run along." The two friends continue walking. Owen sneered and drove off towards Gwen and Diane.

"I know you can be overwhelmed. You can be under whelmed." Diane started, "But can you ever just be whelmed?"

Gwen thought about it, "I think you can in Italy."

Owen pulled up beside the two, "Hi ladies. Would you sweet young birds like a ride?" The two grin at each other before hopping into the car, "Careful of the leather."

Tommy noticed this and elbowed Ianto, "That's a charming new development."

"It's disgusting." Ianto replied simply.

Toshiko meanwhile was on her motorized scooter when it suddenly stopped running in front of where Ianto's car. Popping his head out the window he yelled, "Remove head from sphincter then drive."

Tosh rolled her eyes and moved her scooter to where Rhys was standing, watching Ianto drive off. "You alright?" Rhys asked.

Tosh nodded, "Yeah, yeah. Just a minor encounter with the robot. That's your girlfriend's brother."

"What? That's Gwen's brother?" Rhys couldn't believe it, Gwen was so perfect and from what he'd seen of Ianto, he wasn't.

"Mmhm." Tosh said, "The apathetic Welshman himself." She fiddled a bit on her scooter before it started back up. "See you later, Rhys," she called as she drove off.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Standard still applies.  
A/N: Okay, here's the second bit. Hope you all enjoy it.**

Chapter Two

Martha Jones was happy with how her life had turned out. She was the lead obstetrician at the local hospital and had two kids whom she loved dearly. Mind, they were her step kids but she had been married to their father since Ianto was six so she considered them hers. She smiled sadly at the thought of their father. Tom had died a year and a half ago and ever since she'd been a bit protective of the kids.

She walked into the living room while going through the mail. Seeing Ianto reading something in a chair, she remarked, "You prove that you know everything to someone today?"

Ianto looked up, "Sadly, no. But it's only half four."

Martha smiled when Gwen came in. "Hi Mam."

"Hi, precious." Martha greeted.

Ianto looked up and narrowed his eyes at his sister, "Where've you been?"

"No where."

Martha frowned at the mail, "What's this? It says Canary Wharf?"

Ianto quick snatched it from his Mam and opened it, he was silent as he read it but then a grin broke out on his face, "I got in! I got in!"

Martha frowned, "Uh, honey, that's great. But isn't Canary Wharf not around here?"

"Thus the basis of it's appeal." Ianto replied simply.

"Yeah," Martha continued, "I thought we decided you'd go to UNIT like me. Be a Red Beret."

"No," Ianto said, "you decided."

"Oh, okay." Martha knew that Ianto took his tad's death hard, and was sad disappointed that he wanted to get away, "So you're just gonna pick up and leave, is that it?"

Ianto looked down, "Maybe."

Gwen liked the idea of Ianto suddenly leaving, "Let's hope so."

Ianto shot a glare at Gwen before smiling, "Ask Gwen who drove her home."

"Ianto, don't change the - drove?" Martha turned on Gwen, "Who drove you home?"

"Now don't get upset Mam." Gwen started, "But there's this boy-"

"Who is a flaming imbecile." Ianto cut in.

"-And I think he might ask me-" Gwen continued.

"Please." Martha cut in this time, "I know what he's doing to ask you. And I think I know what the answer is: no. It's always no. What are the house rules?" She asked, raising an eyebrow, "#1, no dating till you graduate. #2, no dating till you graduate. That's it."

"Mam, that's unfair." Gwen said, she knew Ianto used to have a girlfriend. Before their tad died and Martha got over-protective. 'Course Ianto had been heart broken when the girl had broken up with him, but he still had a girlfriend when he was Gwen's age.

"Alright, you wanna know what's unfair?" Martha asked, turning to Ianto, "This is for you too - story could be about your future girlfriend." She took a breath, "This morning I delivered twins to a fifteen year old girl. Do you know what she said to me?"

Gwen thought for a moment, "I'm a crack-whore who should have made my sleazy boyfriend wear a condom?"

Martha nodded, "Close, but no. She said: I should have listened to my mum."

"She did not." Gwen protested.

"Well, that's what she would have said I she wasn't so doped up." Martha concluded.

Gwen rolled her eyes, "Can we focus on me for a second, please? I'm the only person in the school who's not dating."

"No you're not." Martha reminded her, "Your brother doesn't date."

"And I don't intend to." Ianto said.

"And why's that?" Martha was ready for Ianto to back her up and get Gwen to see their side.

"Have you seen the unwashed miscreants that go to that school?"

"Where did you come from?" Gwen asked her brother, "Planet Robot?"

"As opposed to Planet Look At Me, Look At Me?" Ianto snapped back.

Martha sighed and rubbed her hand over her forehead before coming up with a plan, "Okay, here's how we solve this. You can date," she looked at Gwen who looked ecstatic at the idea, "when he does." She pointed to Ianto.

"But he's a mutant!" Gwen protested, "What if he never dates?"

"Then you'll never date." Martha was very happy with the new rule, "Oh, I like that." She turned on them, "And I'll go to sleep at night. A deep slumber of a Mum who who's kids aren't getting impregnated or doing the impregnating." Just then her beeper went of and she headed towards the door. With a glanced at Ianto she said, "We'll talk about Canary Wharf later."

Gwen turned to Ianto, "Can't you find a retard you can take to the movies just so I can have one date?"

"I'm sorry," Ianto started, "Looks like you'll just have to miss the witty repartee of Owen "Eat Me" Harper."

"You suck." Gwen said, walking away.

Ianto imitated her, "You suck."

{{{|

Rhys was tapping his foot quickly, nervous about teaching himself and Gwen French at the same time. Gwen showed up a few minutes late but smiled at him, "Can we make this quick? Beth and John are having a horrendous public breakup on the Plass. Again."

Rhys nodded, "Um, okay. I thought we'd start with pronunciation, is that's alright with you?"

Gwen made a face, "Not the hacking and gagging and spitting part. Please."

Rhys hoped he didn't look nervous when he said, "Well, there is an alternative." He paused, as her eyes were on his face, "French food. We could have some together. Saturday night?" He swallowed dryly.

Gwen grinned, "You're asking me out. That's so cute." She paused, "What's your name again?"

"Rhys. Listen, I know your Step Mam doesn't let you date. But I thought that if it were for French Class it-"

"Oh, wait a minute, Rich." Gwen started.

"Rhys." He corrected her.

"My Mam just came up with a new rule. I can date when my brother does." Gwen smiled at the idea of dating.

"You're kidding!" Rhys grinned, "Well, let me ask you, do you like sailing? 'Cause I read about this place that rents boats-"

"A beaucoup problemo, Roland. In case you haven't heard, my brother is a particularly hideous breed of loser." Gwen frowned.

Rhys nodded, "Yeah, yeah. I noticed he's a little anti-social. Why is that?"

Gwen shrugged, "Unsolved mystery. He used to be really popular, and then it was like, he got sick of it. Or something. There is a bet as to why, but I'm pretty sure he's just incapable of human interaction." She paused, "Plus he's a bastard."

Rhys had to think up a plan. "Well yeah, but I'm sure, you know, there's lots of girls who wouldn't mind going out with a… difficult man." He paused, "It'd be like extreme dating. Trying to get him to show emotion or something."

Gwen blinked, "You think we could find someone that extreme?"

"Sure, why not?" He sounded slightly hopeful.

Gwen reached out and put her hand on his arm, "And you'd do that? For me?"

"Oh yes!" Rhys noticed he sounded a bit too excited at the idea so he added, "I mean, you know, I could look into it."

{{{|

Toshiko wondered how Rhys could talk her into it, but she gathered up a few girls who may want to go out with Ianto. The two friends questioned them to find out who was the best candidate.

"Hey, how you doing?" Rhys asked the girls one by one each in turn. "Would any of you be interested in dating Ianto Jones?"

The First girl asked, "Does he like Pina Coladas? And getting caught in the rain?"

Second one simply stared blankly.

Third girl chuckled, "Never been that high."

Fourth one stated that she was going to be a nun.

{{{|

Rhys sighed and went up to Gwen, "It's very difficult to find a woman who'll go out with your brother."

Gwen shrugged, "Don't limit yourself, Rhys."

His eyebrows rose in question. "What do you mean?"

"Okay," she explained, "So I know my brother likes girls, but I'm fairly certain he likes guys too." Gwen said, "I've seen him staring intently at the telly when a cute guy is on it."

"Oh, okay." Rhys said nodding, "So, we can look for both girls and guys?"

"Yeah, though not certain on the guys." Gwen added, "But you can try it."

{{{|

Tosh rounded up some guys in an attempt to find someone, anyone. Rhys asked them the same question, "Would any of you be interested in dating Ianto Jones?"

The first one said, "No, I'm a vegan, thanks."

Second guy yelled and ran off.

Third one chuckled, "He's the one who beat up the guy with the golf club?" He paused at as Tosh responded negatively. "Oh. Then no."

Fourth guy thought about it, "Maybe if we were the last two people on earth. And there were no sheep." He paused, eyes going wide with excitement, "Are there sheep?"

{{{|

The next day, Tosh and Rhys were sitting in biology class, when Tosh said blurted suddenly. "Did I, or did I not tell you it was pointless? No one will go out with him."

Rhys looked around and saw the guy he had seen come into Ms. Noble's office the first day. Currently he was flirting with everyone around him. "What about him?"

Tosh followed Rhys' gaze to Jack, "Him? No no. Don't look at him okay? I heard that the Russians had used him as their go-to guy for torture. And that he was a rent boy not that long ago. He just got back from doing a year in jail."

"Yeah, well." Rhys said, "At least he's horny."

"I'm serious, that man is not right." Tosh said, "He sold his own liver on the black market to buy a new set of speakers. And then proceeded to seduce the guy selling the speakers so that he could keep his money along with the speakers."

Rhys grinned. "He's our guy." Standing up, he walked over to Jack. "Hi, how you doin'?"

Jack looked Rhys up and down, and said leering. "I'm doing fantastic." Leaning in close, he purred into the younger boy's his ear, "Shall we meet somewhere and have some passionate denial sex?"

Rhys swallowed and stepped back, "Wh-What would you say to a blind date?"

Jack's eyes narrowed, calculating. "No," he said simply, and with that he stalked away.

Walking back to Tosh he sighed, "No luck, but he came onto me."

"How do we get him to date Ianto?" Tosh asked.

"Well," Rhys started, "We could pay him. But we don't have money."

"What we need is a backer."

Rhys tilted his head, "What's that?"

"Someone with money who's stupid." Tosh said, thinking. She grinned, "I know who would front this idea."

At lunch Tosh went sat at Owen's lunch table. "Are you lost?" He asked snidely. when she sat down.

"No, actually. I came to chat." Tosh gave a small smile.

"We don't chat," Owen pointed out.

"Well, actually, I thought I'd run an idea past you. See if you're interested." Tosh kept her face open, trying to seem like she didn't have a secret plan.

"I'm not." Owen replied quickly, taking a bite from his food.

"Hear me out," Toshiko protested. "You want Gwen, right? But you can't go out with her because her brother is an insane head case and no one will go out with him, right?"

"Does this conversation have a purpose?"

"What you need to do is, you need to hire someone who'll go out with him. Someone who can flirt their way into a date." Tosh gave a slight smile as she pointed to Jack who was laughing at his friend John Hart's joke.

"That guy?" Owen asked, "I once heard that he'd have sex with anything, even if it was an alien."

Tosh nodded, "Clearly a solid investment."

Owen regarded Tosh. "What's in it for you?"

She knew this is where she really had to sell it, "Hey, I'm walking down the hall and say hello to you. You say hello to me."

Owen nodded, "Yeah, yeah. I get it. Cool by association. I'll think about it."

Tosh nodded her thanks and walked back to Rhys who was upset, "What did you get him involved for?"

"Relax now, relax." She soothed, "We let him pretend he's calling the shots. While he's setting things up you have time with Gwen."

"That's a good idea." Rhys conceded.

{{{|

Owen walked up to Jack, who was sitting on the bleachers by the sports field, "Hey, how you doin'?"

Jack raised an eyebrow. "Do I know you?"

"See that boy?" Owen indicating Ianto in football practice. Jack nodded, "That's Ianto Jones. I want you to go out with him."

"Now why would you want that?" Jack regarded Owen.

Owen sighed, "Look. I can't date his sister until Ianto starts dating. You see, their Step Mum is messed up. She's got this rule where they can't-"

"That's a touching story. It really is. Not my problem."

"Would you be willing to make it your problem if I provided generous compensation?" Owen asked with a small grin.

"You're going to pay me to take out some guy?" Jack asked. When Owen nodded he continued. "How much?"

"Twenty." Owen said earning a stare from Jack. "Fine, thirty."

Jack's eyes glinted. "Well, let's think about this. We go to the movies, that's uh, fifteen. We get popcorn. That's uh, fifty-three. And uh, he'll want dark chocolate, right? Good for his serotonin levels. So, uh, we're looking at seventy-five." He smirked when he was done.

"This ain't a negotiation," Owen growled. "Take it or leave it."

Jack's grin grew. "Fifty and we've got a deal." Owen nodded, leaving Jack to make his way to the field. where the coach, Rose Tyler, was telling them all they had a good practice. Walking up to Ianto, he called out. "Hey boy. How you doin'?"

Ianto regarded Jack coolly. "Sweating like a pig actually. And yourself?"

Jack couldn't help but grin at Ianto's dead pan. "Now there's a way to get a guy's attention, huh?"

"My mission in life." He raised an eyebrow. "But obviously I struck your fancy. So, you see, it worked. The world makes sense again." He rolled his eyes as he started walking away.

Jack chased after him. "Pick you up Friday then."

"Oh right. Friday. Uh-huh." Ianto hadn't even looked back.

Jack frowned. Normally he didn't have to work this hard to get someone to even look at him. "The night I take you places you've never been before," he persisted.

"Like where? Tescos? Do you even know my name, screw boy?" he asked, finally turning around.

"I know a lot more than you think," Jack protested.

"Doubtful." Ianto turned back around, going to the locker room, leaving Jack there alone. "Very doubtful."

Rhys frowned, having watched the exchange. "We're screwed."

Tosh sighed. "Hey, no, hey. I don't want to hear that defeatist attitude. I want to hear you upbeat." No mention was made of her pep talk ability.

Rhys put on a big fake grin and made his voice overly chipper. "We're screwed!"

"There you go." She spoke, giving Rhys a small grin.

{{{|

The next day Ianto came out of the store to find Jack examining his car. He frowned and walked towards it. Not to Jack, though, Jack just happened to be beside his destination.

"Nice ride. Vintage fenders." Jack observed, grinning.

Ianto frowned. "Are you following me?"

Jack's grin fell. He really wasn't used to someone who didn't fall at his feet. This was interesting. "I was over there," he pointed to a store across the street. "I saw your car. I came over to say hi."

Without any emotion, Ianto responded. "Hi." He went to open the door but Jack slid over and blocking Ianto's way.

"Not a big talker, huh?"

"Depends on the topic." Ianto was wondering if this was going to turn into another line that was supposed to make him fall madly in love. "My fenders don't whip me in a verbal frenzy."

Jack couldn't help it, he let his interested in the fact that Ianto wasn't flirting back show. "You don't really like me, do you?"

Ianto's mask fell. "Like you? Why would I like you? I barely know you." It was a genuine question.

"Well, most people love me right away." Jack gave another grin that sent most people into blushing and giggling fits.

"Well, I don't."

"Well, maybe you don't know me well enough to like me," Jack started. "but I'm sure you've thought about me naked, huh?" He gave Ianto a knowing wink.

"Am I that transparent?" Ianto's tone was even more monotone than Jack had ever heard it, "I want you. I need you. Oh baby. Oh baby." He slid around Jack and opened his car door before quickly getting in and shutting it behind him. Just then Owen, in his red sports car, chose that moment to drive up behind Ianto and park him in. To himself, Ianto asked, "What is it? Arsewhole day?" To Owen he said, "Do you mind?"

Smirking Owen walked past him towards the store. "Not at all."

Ianto glared and hitting the gas, slammed into Owen's car. Jack burst out laughing while Owen's mouth fell open. "You Bastard!"

Ianto had a most innocent look on his face. "Whoops."


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Standard still applies.  
A/N: I'm glad you all are liking this so well. :D**

Chapter Three

"Whoops?" Martha asked as she paced, looking at Ianto who was lounging calmly on the sofa. "My insurance doesn't cover Teen Mood-Swings."

Ianto looked at her, "Tell them I had a seizure."

Martha sighed and put her hands on her hips, "Is this about Canary Wharf? Are you punishing me because I want you to stay close to home?"

Ianto looked up, "No, this is about you making decisions for me."

"I'm your mother, it's my right," Martha responded, knowing that Ianto would not bring up the point that she was actually his step-mum.

"So what I want doesn't matter?" Ianto sat up, questioning.

"You're eighteen. You don't know what you want." Martha didn't want more of her family leaving her. "And you won't know what you want until you're forty-five. And if you get it, you'll be too old to use it."

"I want to go to Canary Wharf. I want you to trust me to make my own choices!" Ianto argued back, "I want you stop controlling my life because you're afraid that if you didn't I'd leave you."

"Oh yeah, well you know what I want-" Martha stopped abruptly, interrupted by her pager. Sighing, she responded. "We'll continue this later."

Ianto rolled his eyes, "Can't wait." Standing up, he left the room, practically running into Gwen.

She glared at Ianto. "Did you just maim Owen's car?"

"Yeah." Ianto said, tone dead, "Looks like you're going to have to take the bus."

"Has the fact that you are completely psycho managed to escape your attention?" Gwen spat out at her brother who just ignored her and walked away.

{{{|

The next day Jack stood at his locker. When he shut it, he was greeted by Owen, glaring at him. Jack sighed and leaned up against the lockers.

"When I shell out fifty," Owen said, "I expect results."

Jack rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I'm on it."

Owen continued glaring. "Watching that fag violate my car doesn't count as a date." Owen continued glaring. He then dropped the glare, "If you don't get any, I don't get any." He punched Jack on the shoulder. "So get some." He started walking off then turned to leave.

Without raising his voice, he called out. "I just upped my price."

Owen turned, mouth open slightly. "What?"

"Hundred a date." Jack paused, "In advance."

"Forget it."

"Forget his sister then." He flashed Owen a grin.

Owen shot a glare at Jack as he walked over, getting more money out. "You better hope you're as smooth as you think you are, Harkness."

Jack took the money, his smile growing.

{{{|

Later on in class Rhys and Tosh noticed that Jack's friend John left him. "Go." Tosh said.

"You go." Rhys replied

"No, you go." Toshiko protested.

"I went before." Rhys wasn't keen on getting hit on again. He eventually sighed and the pair walked over to Jack. Rhys swallowed, facing the other boy, "We know what you're trying to do, with Ianto Jones."

Jack looked the two over before leaving his eyes on Rhys' face, "Is that right? And what do you plan to do about it?"

"Help you out."

Jack was surprised by that answer;, he tilted his head, "Why's that?"

Tosh spoke up then, "The situation is, Rhys here," she patted her friend's arm, "really likes Gwen Jones."

"What is with this chick?" Jack asked, clearly not caring, "She have beer flavored nipples?"

"Hey," Rhys protested.

Tosh put her hand in front of Rhys, silently telling him to calm down, "I think I speak correctly when I say that Rhys' love is pure. Purer than say, Owen Harper's." She gave a small smile.

"Look." Jack said, making eye contact with both before continuing, "I'm in it for the cash. Harper can plow whoever he wants."

"Okay. There will be no plowing!" Rhys responded a bit too loudly.

"Jack." Tosh said, stepping closer to him, "Let me explain something to you here. We set this whole thing up so Rhys can get the girl. Rhys." she stated again, making it clear, "Owen's just a pawn." She gave a mischievous grin.

"So you two are going to help me get emotions out of him?" Jack looked from one to the other, questioningly hesitant.

"Yeah, we'll do some research." Tosh nodded, "We'll fine out what he likes. We're your friends in this."

Rhys glanced at Tosh, "And she means that in a strictly not-porn-movie type of way."

Tosh nodded, "Let's start here." She pulled out a flyer, "Now, Friday night. Mary is having a party. It's the perfect opportunity." Rhys gave her a look, remembering his first day when he found out Mary had betrayed Toshiko.

"Opportunity for what?" Jack's brow furrowed.

"For you to take out Ianto." Tosh stated. Some would say she was warped on the inside.

"I'll think about it." Jack replied, walking away.

Tosh turned to Rhys with the flyer in her hand, "Now for a little payback." Her grin grew, "This is gonna be some party." On the flyer it said that there was going to free beer and to just show up along with Mary's address. They two shared a smirk and stood at the top of a flight of stairs before throwing a stack down. The sheets started to fluttered down and as hands reached out to grab them.

{{{|

Owen stood with Gwen at his locker, they two grinning at each other. "Okay now, this is important." He paused and reached into his locker, getting two pictures of himself, "Which one do you like better?" In both the pictures he had the same pose and facial expression, the only difference was in one he wore a white shirt while the other was in black.

Gwen frowned thinking about it, "Uh, I think I like the white on better."

Owen nodded, "Yeah, it's more…"

"Pensive?" Gwen supplied.

Owen frowned, "Damn, I was going for thoughtful." he shrugged. and Gwen's face contorted in a look of amazement of how dense Owen was. As he placed the pictures in his bag, he asked, "So, you going to Mary's thing Friday night?"

Gwen gave a shy smile, "Yeah. I might."

Owen looked Gwen up and down and gave her his most flirtatious smile. He felt it wasn't that great anymore, not after seeing Jack's, but he attempted anyway, "Good. 'Cause, you know, I'm not gonna bother going if you won't be there."

{{{|

Gwen was walking with Rhys, just hanging out instead of working on their French. "So," Rhys started, glancing at Gwen, "Have you heard about Mary's party?"

Gwen pouted, "Yes. And I really, really wanna go, but I can't." She looked at him, "Not unless my brother goes."

Rhys frowned, "Yeah I know. I'm working on that." He paused, "So far he's not going for my guy." He decided he needed more information on Ianto, "Sure he might be gay?"

"I found a picture of Johnny Depp in his in his drawer once, so I know it's an option." She paused, "He had a girlfriend once. Lisa. That was back when he was popular, two years ago. She left him for a guy she met online." She tilted her head, "A sort of cyberman."

Rhys nodded, "So, that's the kind of people does he likes? Pretty ones?"

"I don't know." Gwen said, "All I've ever heard him say is he'd never date someone who was unfaithful. Probably why he didn't fight too hard to keep Lisa."

"Okay. Alright." Rhys nodded, "What else?"

"You're asking me to investigate the inner workings of my brother's twisted mind,? I don't think so."

"Well, nothing else has worked." Rhys stated, "We need to go behind enemy lines here." The two shared a look before Gwen nodded.

They soon found themselves in Ianto's bedroom. It was an organized chaos with books lining most walls and a neatly made bed. Rhys stood back as Gwen went through Ianto's drawers. She stood up and gave him a stack of papers. "Okay, here we go. Class schedule, reading list, date book, coffee tickets, um, concert tickets." She sighed and sat down on Ianto's bed.

Rhys looked them over, "This might work. Yeah. Good work, Gwen." He smiled at her.

{{{|

Tosh and Rhys stared at the bar with wide eyes. "He's in there." Tosh said, getting out of Rhy's car, "Let's go tell Jack how he can seduce Ianto."

The two went inside and quickly found Jack who it seemed was playing a game of darts for money, and was hustling the others. Rhys almost put his hand on a table when Toshiko slapped it away,

"Don't touch anything. You might get hepatitis."

Jack turned when he noticed the two, "So, what've you got for me?" he asked as he took a sip of his beer.

"A little insight to a complicated guy." Rhys said.

"Just one question before we start," Tosh said to Jack, "Should you be drinking alcohol if you don't have a liver?"

"What?" Jack asked, putting down his beer.

"Nothing. Nothing." She gave him a tight smile.

Rhys sighed, "Bit of a problem,: Ianto likes pretty people."

It was silent for a moment when Jack suddenly spoke, "Are you telling me I'm not a pretty guy?" He seemed slightly hurt.

Tosh quickly said to Rhys, "He's very pretty. He's a gorgeous guy."

"I wasn't sure." Rhys added just as quickly. "I didn't know." He then pulled out a list of things, "Alright. Okay - likes: Thai food, thought-provoking books, and a large variety to music. Here's a list of CD's he has in his room." He handed over the list.

Jack glanced at it, "So I'm supposed to buy him noodles and listen to music I may not like, right?"

The two looked at each other, "Ever been to Club Raven?"

"His favorite band is playing there tomorrow night." Rhys added.

Jack looked horrified, "I can't be seen at Club Raven, alright?" It was a place where only goth-rocker's went. He was actually surprised Ianto's favorite band was someone who would play there. Ianto didn't seem the type who would like that genre of music.

"Just assail your ears for one night." Tosh said, understanding.

And that was how Jack found himself at Club Raven. He dressed as he usually did, not fitting in with the crowd. He looked around the dance floor and grinned when he saw Ianto dancing along with Tommy. He saw the Welshman heading towards the bar and Jack before he quickly made his way over so that he was there when Ianto reached it. So as to arrive at the same time.

Ianto saw Jack but Jack made it clear he was ignoring Ianto, "Two waters." Ianto told the bartender. He then rolled his eyes at Jack trying to disregard him. "If you're planning on asking me out again, you'd better get it over with." He yelled over the music.

Jack pretended he was trying to listen to the music, "Would you mind? You're kinda ruining this for me." He paused, "You know these guys aren't too bad." He stood up and went into the crowd.  
Ianto followed after Jack, "Really?"

Jack nodded, "Yeah, don't you agree?" He took a sip of his drink that he had gotten at the bar, "I was watching you out there before-" the song suddenly stopped and Jack without realizing it he hadn't lowered his voice, "-I've never seen you look so sexy." It was heard clearly through the crowd. The crowd people laughed at that as the band started playing the next song. He grinned anyway, "Come to Mary's party with me."

"You never give up do you?" Ianto's voice sounded amused.

"Was that a yes?" Jack asked, watching Ianto walking away.

"No." Ianto yelled back.

"Well, was that a no?"

"No."

Jack grinned, "I'll see you at half nine then."

{{{|

Friday night came quickly and Gwen and Diane were trying to sneak out of Gwen's house in their party clothes, shushing each other and making sure they didn't step on any loud floorboards. As they passed through the living room doorway towards the front door Martha didn't even look up from her paper when she said, "Should've used the window."

The two froze and Gwen suddenly tried to look normal, "Hi Mam."

Martha turned around and looked the girls up and down, "Hi. Where you going?"

Gwen swallowed, trying to sound normal, "If you must know, a small study group of friends."

"Otherwise known as an orgy?" Martha accused, raising an eyebrow.

"Ms. Jones." Diane said, "It's just a party."

Just then Ianto came walking down the stairs, not knowing anything about what was going on and stopped at the bottom. when Martha asked him, "You know anything any party?"

He shrugged and shook his head.

Gwen almost stomped her foot, "People expect me to be there!"

Martha sighed, "If Ianto's not going, you're not going."

Gwen turned to Ianto, "Why can't you be normal?" She glared at him.

"Define 'normal'?" Ianto asked.

"Mary's party is normal."

"Mary's party," Ianto started, "is just a lame excuse for all the idiots at our school to drink beer and rub up against each other in hopes of distracting themselves from the pathetic emptiness of their-"

Gwen and Diane both cut in, speaking as one, clearly used to this saying, "-meaningless, consumer-driven lives."

Ianto stopped, completely surprised by how predicable he had apparently become. He frowned at himself.

Gwen decided to plea, "Can you, for just one night, forget that you've got no feelings and be my brother? Please? Please? Come on, Ianto, please do this for me?" She was very sincere and hoped Ianto would agree.

Ianto sighed and rolled his eyes, giving in, "Fine. I'll make an appearance." The two girls squealed in delight.

Martha frowned, "It's starting."

"It's just a party, Mam." Gwen stated.

"I want you to wear the belly." Martha got up to fetch it.

"Mam, no." Gwen protested.

Martha rolled her eyes, "Not all night. Just around the living room for a minute so you can fully understand the full weight of your decisions." She got out a faux-pregnancy jacket and walked towards Gwen who admitted defeat, letting her Mam put it on her. It had weights in it and gave the full look of pregnancy; Gwen immediately had to put her hands on her hips to keep her balance.

"I am perfectly aware-" Gwen started.

"Listen to me." Martha asked in a soft voice, "Every time you think of kissing a boy, I want you to picture wearing this under your shirt."

"You are completely unbalanced." Gwen replied, but still loving Martha all the same. Lovingly.

"Uh-huh." Martha agreed absently, kissing Gwen's forehead.

Ianto sighed, "We're going now."

Martha turned to Ianto, "Alright, wait a minute. No drinking. No drugs. No kissing. No tattoos. No piercings. No ritual animal slaughter of any kind-" Ianto raised and eyebrow as Martha gasped at herself, "Oh God, I'm giving them ideas."

Ianto rolled his eyes and opened the door to see Jack standing there, clearly ready to knock on it. "What are you doing here?" And how did the American know where he lived?

"Nine-thirty, right?" Jack gave a grin. Ianto did his best to hide his shock, "I'm early."

Ianto sighed, "Whatever. I'm driving."

Jack looked in through the door and saw Gwen with the faux-pregnancy jacket, "Who knocked up your sister?"

Across town at Toshiko's house she and Rhys were getting ready for the party themselves. And Rhys was watching Tosh adding the finishing touches to her make-up, "So, then Gwen says that I was right. That she didn't wear those shoes with that dress because she thought it was mixing genres. Right?" He wasn't even taking a breath between talking, "The fact that I noticed - and this is a direct quote - "really meant something"." He looked at Tosh, waiting for her reply.

"You told me that part already." she sounded slightly bored.

"I've been thinking about it all the time-"

Tosh cut him off, "Stop being so self-involved for one minute. How do I look?" She gave Rhys a little twirl.

"You look good." Rhys responded, smiling.

"Good." Tosh nodded, "Let's go."


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Standard still applies.**

Chapter Four

Mary glared about her when her house had been suddenly taken over by her classmates, who had stormed in, bringing beer and music and noise. She was very glad that her parents were out of town for week.; Though she already knew that she'd have to hire someone to clean up the mess.

Ianto and Jack made their way through the crowd when a girl attached herself to Jack, "Kiss me!" She told him.

Jack really wouldn't say no but in his peripheral vision he saw Ianto glanced at him and he knew he couldn't kiss her,. Grabbing her and turned her to a nearby guy, "Kiss him."

"Okay!" she grinned and clung to the stranger, kissing him deeply.

Ianto had continued walking through the crowd and walked on into the next room where he ran into found Owen, "Sweet!" he held a drink in his hand, "Lookin' fresh tonight, Ianto."

Ianto rolled his eyes and pointed to Owen's head, "Is that? Did your hairline just recede?"

Owen quickly brought his hand up to his hair in panic before realizing Ianto had started walking away, he jumped after him, "Hey, where you going?"

"Away."

"Your sister here?" Owen asked.

Ianto turned and glared, voice dark, "You stay away from my sister."

Owen gave a smirk, "Oh, I'll stay away from your sister. But I can't guarantee that she'll stay away from me."

Just then a loud crash came from the other room along with the word, "Fight!"

Owen grinned, "Ooo. Fight!" He bounded into the room. and Ianto continued along his way.

Later Owen had his arm around Gwen and smirked when he spotted her brother. "Ianto, guess who found me?"

Gwen was doing her best to ignore her brother as Owen was steered them away. Ianto said, "Gwen, wait."

Gwen turned around, looking annoyed, "Please don't address me in public."

"No wait. There's something I need to tell you." he said in earnest, hoping she would listen to him.

"Look, I'm busy enjoying my adolescence," Gwen said, "so scamper off and do the same." Owen they walked off then, leaving Ianto by himself. A man came by with a tray full of shots.

"Want one?"

Jack had just found Ianto in time to see him nodding to the man and grabbing a shot before quickly downing it with apparent discomfort.

"I've been looking all over the place for you." Jack said, ignoring the man with the shots, "And what's this?" He nodded to the empty shot glass that Ianto put on the tray before grabbing another one. He did not drink it right away, Jack noticed, but he also did not put it back down.

Mockingly Ianto said, "I'm getting trashed man." he then asked in his normal tone, "Isn't that what you're supposed to do at a party?"

"I dunno." Jack said, "I usually say do what you wanna do."

Ianto all but sneered, "Funny. You're the only one." He downed that shot and went into the next room, leaving Jack again.

Upon arrival Rhys and Toshiko had split up; soon enough they met up again. "Hey, seen Gwen around anywhere?" he was asked, looking around nervously.

Tosh looked around, spotting her and Diane coming down the stairs, she pointed at them. "Relax, relax. Follow the love."

Rhys smiled and walked over to them, "Hi Gwen."

"Oh, hi Rhys." She paused, unsure what to do, "You know Diane?"

"Yeah." Rhys looked at Diane, "I think we have art together, right?"

"Neat." Diane bit out, ; clearly she didn't see it as neat.

Rhys ignored Diane, "So uh, you look really amazing."

Gwen looked down, "Thanks." She had said a small smile on her face.

Owen walked down the stairs and grinned when he saw the girls, obviously hearing the compliment Rhys have Gwen. he said, "We all know I look amazing." Diane looked at him and grinned ; , she approved of Owen over Rhys any day. He put an arm around Gwen, "Ladies, lets go. We're all congregating around Mr. Cuervo."

Gwen allowed herself to be led away but looked back at Rhys, "Um, I'll see you around, okay?"

Rhys watched them leave, absolutely crushed. Clearly Gwen was using him to get to Owen. She didn't really want him. He sighed and turned around, wanting out of the party.

Owen had a beer in one hand and his arm slung over Gwen's shoulder, just talking to her, "So, I've got this Catalog thing going on - and the tube sock gig. That's gonna be huge!" He paused, "And I'm up for a hemorrhoid cream ad next week." Gwen made face of disgust, "I know it sound kind of bogus, but I get to do some acting." He let go of her and put his empty beer can onto a tall pyramid of others and struck a pose, feet spread apart, hands on his hips and head looking to the left. After a few seconds he looked back at Gwen, "See what I did there?"

"Uh-huh." Even though she didn't.

"That was underwear." Owen said happily, "I'll show you the bathing suit one next." And he proceeded to strike the same pose. "See the difference?"

Gwen looked away,. What had she ever seen in Owen?. He was just stupid. He couldn't hold much of a conversation and would only talk about himself. Rhys talked about her all the time. She sighed, wishing she had gone with Rhys instead. Standing up, she left, finding Diane, "Is it just me, or does this party suck all the sudden?"

Meanwhile Jack had been searching the crowded party for Ianto. and When he did find him the Welshman had some alcohol in one hand and by the looks of him, had quite a few already. He frowned,

"Hey hey hey! Why don't you let me have this one, huh?"

Ianto pulled the cup closer to him, "No. This one's mine." He moved away again but Jack wasn't going about to let him get out of his sight. That is, until Owen patted Jack on the shoulder.

"My man! How did you get him to do it?"

"Do what?" Jack asked, actually worried for Ianto.

"Act like a human?" They walked into the next room where Ianto climbed up on an expensive table and started dancing, the crowd cheering at the sight. Gwen was up on a balcony and saw her brother. and she hurt because though she often wished he was normal and did that sort of thing easily, it just wasn't him. She rushed off hoping to escape the party.

Jack watched, close to the table, as Ianto danced and then hit his head on the ceiling lamp, pausing for a second before falling down. Jack, catching him and looked down at the drunken man over, worried, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Ianto protested, trying to sit up but before falling back again.

"You're not fine." Jack tried to not let his anxiety show through. "C'mon." He helped Ianto walk down the hallway.

"I just need to lie down somewhere." Ianto said, slurred, trying to lay down on a chair.

"No. You lie down you go to sleep." Jack pulled Ianto back into a standing position.

"Sleep is good." Ianto grinned.

"Yeah." Jack said, "Not if you have a concussion." He led Ianto outside of Mary's house and sitting him down in a chair, "Here, sit down. Sit." He helped Ianto get some balance.

Rhys spotted Jack propping Ianto into a sitting position. Tapping him on the shoulder, "Hey, we need to talk."

"I'm a little busy right now ," he responded, irritated.

"Can you give me a second?" Rhys asked and as Jack turned to look at him, leaving Ianto to sit by himself, "It's off, okay? The whole things off."

"What are you talking about?" Jack's brow furrowed in confusion.

"She never wanted me." Rhys all but yelled, "She wanted Owen the whole time."

Jack really didn't have time for this, he had a drunk and probably concussed Welshman to deal with, "Rhys - do you like the girl?" he asked a bit forceful.

"Yeah."

"Yeah. And is she worth all this trouble?" He was very impatient.

"Well, I thought she was." Rhys said slowly, "But, you know, I-"

"Well either she is, or she isn't." Jack cut him off, "See, first of all, Owen's not half the man you are." Rhys smiled at that, "Secondly, don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want. Go for it." He quickly turned when Ianto started to fall off the chair. Catching him he stood up, bringing the man to his feet. "C'mon." he lead Ianto away from the party and left Rhys to think about the advice he just got.

Jack was basically marched Ianto up a hill to a swing set. "You're so patronizing." Ianto said, annoyed that Jack was holding him up.

"Leave it to you to use big words when you're smashed."

Ianto pushed Jack away, wanting to walk on his own, "I don't think so." He promptly fell on the ground and then stood back up, "Why are you doing this?"

Jack reached out and helped Ianto again, "I told you, you may have a concussion."

"You don't care if I never wake up." The way Ianto said it struck a chord with Jack, it seemed as if he thought no one would care.

Jack grinned, "Sure I do." He realized that he actually did care. 'Course he wasn't that heartless.

"Why?" Ianto asked as Jack set him down on the swing set.

Jack sat down on the swing next to him, "Well then, I'd have to start talking to people who actually like me." He flashed another grin.

"Like you could find one."

"See that there?" Jack pointed to Ianto, "Who needs affection when I have blind hatred."

Ianto smiled at Jack, sitting fine for a bit before suddenly falling backwards out of the swing.

"Jesus!" Jack grabbed him again, helping him get back into the swing. Making sure Ianto was fine After some fussing, he continued the conversation, "Why do you let him get to you?"

"Who?"

"Owen."

"I hate him." A frown darkened the younger man's face.

Jack sighed, "Well, I think you found the perfect revenge: mainlining tequila." shared a laugh.

"Well, you know what they say." Ianto started.

"No, what do they say?" Jack couldn't help but smile. That is until he looked at Ianto and saw he was asleep. Startled, he jumped out of the swing and started patting Ianto's cheek. "No no no no!

Ianto! C'mon, wake up! Look at me! Listen to me, Ianto. Open your eyes!" Worry was apparent in his voice. He slapped Ianto lightly.

Ianto opened his eyes and smiled up at Jack, "Hey. You're eyes are really blue." Jack smiled in relief, glad that Ianto was fine. They stared at each other for a few seconds before Ianto threw up on Jack's feet.

{{{|

Gwen was waiting around with Diane, talking about going with the crowd to a new place to party, "I don't know if we should go." Gwen said.

Owen walked up then, "Hey, we're going to Janet's house. Ready?"

Gwen said, "I uh, I have to be home in twenty minutes." Not to mention she really didn't want to go. The party wasn't anything like she thought it would be.

Diane was eager to go, "You know," she said in a flirting tone, "I don't have to be home 'til two."

Owen glanced at Gwen, "One more chance."

"Oh man." Gwen said with fake disappointment, "I can't. Damn."

"That's a shame." Diane turned to Owen, "Well?"

Owen tilted his head, "You wanna go?"

"Sure!"

"Diane!" Gwen couldn't believe her friend was leaving her.

"Hey, you passed." Diane smirked as Owen wrapped his arm around her shoulders and the two walked off.

Rhys came out of the door to see Gwen standing by herself. "Hey, you have fun tonight?" He had an edge to his tone.

"Tons." Gwen said sarcastically. She watched as he started walking away, "Hey, Rhys?" He stopped and turned while she flashed him a shy smile, "Could you give me a ride home?"


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Standard still applies.  
A/N: My cat is asleep in my lap and now I can't really move...**

Chapter Five

Jack was drove Ianto home and he was listening to the radio, singing along with the radio happily.

"I should do this!" Ianto exclaimed loudly.

"Do what?"

"This!" Ianto pointed to the radio.

"Start a band?" Jack asked, glancing at him.

"No," Ianto started sarcastically, "install car stereos." He paused, "Yeah, start a band. My Mam would love that." He sighed as they parked outside of Ianto's house.

"You strike me as the type of person who wouldn't ask for their Mom's permission." Jack turned to face him.

"Oh, so now you think you know me?" Ianto eyed Jack, venom in his voice.

"I'm getting there," he responded, giving Ianto a small smile.

He sighed, back to his normal, calm self. "The only thing people know about is that 'I have no emotions.'"

"People don't know me either." Their eyes met, sharing a sort of connection for a length. Jack then shook his head, "So, what's up with your Mom? She a pain in the ass?"

"No." Ianto leaned back in his seat, "She's just worried that I'd leave her. She wants me to be someone I'm not."

"Who?"

"Gwen." His eyes found the stereo.

"Ah, Gwen." Jack did wonder why everyone was so busy talking about her, "No offense or anything, I mean, I know everyone loves your sister." Ianto gave a nod of agreement, "But she's without."

Ianto looked at Jack, a smile playing at his lips. "You know, you're not as vile as I thought you were." Jack grinned at that and Ianto leaned towards Jack, their faces getting closer. Close enough for

Jack to smell the alcohol on Ianto's breath and he pulled back, knowing that he'd be taking advantage of him.

"Maybe we should do this another time."

Ianto glared at Jack before quickly getting out of the car.

Meanwhile Rhys stopped his own car outside of Gwen's house and they sat in silence, unsure what to say to one another. "You never wanted to go sailing with me, did you?" He asked her quietly.

"Yes I did." She was lying, wanting to be nice.

"No. You didn't."

"Well, okay. No. Not actually." Gwen looked down.

"Well, then that's all you had to say." Rhys ranted, "Have you always been this selfish?"

Gwen nodded slightly, "Yes." she bleated weakly.

"You know, just because you're beautiful, doesn't mean you can treat people like they don't matter. I mean, I really like you." His voice twisted, not as angry anymore, "Okay? I defended you when people called you conceded. I helped you when you asked me to. I learned French for you." he sounded slightly amused by the last one before the anger came back, "And then you just blow me off-"

She surprised him by grabbing the boy and pulling him in for a kiss. before pulling back. He gaped at her, completely surprised as she gave him a smile before exiting the car and going into her house.

{{{|

Ianto sighed as he went into the Doctor's class the next day. People were saying things like, "Ianto, you sway to the rhythm of my heart." "Wanna dance with me? We can do the robot." all about him dancing on the table. But the worst was when Owen asked, "Ianto, what do we owe you for the table dance?"

The Doctor was leaning against his desk and when everyone sat down, he started talking when everyone had finally been seated. "Alright. How was everybody's weekend?"

"I don't know," Owen said, "maybe we should ask Ianto!" He turned and smirked at the other boy.

"Unless he kicked the crap out of your dumb butt, I don't want to hear about it." the Doctor believed that Ianto could, after seeing what he had done to John Hart anyway. "Okay, let's open our books to page 73, sonnet 141. And listen up." He opened his own book and started reciting it as if it were a modern day song, ""In faith, I do not love thee with mine eyes. For they and thee a thousand errors note. But 'tis my heart loves what they despise, who in despite of view is pleas'd to dote."" The students were into the performance. "Shakespeare may be a dead guy, but he knows his stuff. I want you all to write your own version of this sonnet." He was met with groans. Ianto raised his hand, making the Doctor frown. Normally Ianto did always found something wrong with the assignment and fought it, "Yes Mr.-I-Have-An-Opinion-About-Everything?"

"Do you want this in iambic pentameter?" Ianto asked.

The Doctor looked surprised, "You're not going to fight me on this?"

"No, I think it's a good assignment."

"You're messing with me, aren't you?"

"No. I'm really looking forward to writing it." Ianto smiled which was really throwing the Doctor off; he was sure he was being mocked.

"Get out of my class." He thought Ianto was mocking him.

"What?" Ianto raised an eyebrow.

"Out. Get out."

Ianto shrugged and slowly got up, heading towards Donna's office.

{{{|

Tommy stood at his locker which was pasted with pictures of the 1920's was posted all over. Toshiko smiled at a picture of a dancer and movie star from that era. "Cool. Louise Brooks."

"You know her?" Tommy he asked, surprised.

"Yeah. And I know you really like the early 1920's." they shared a smile, glad that someone else knew about that long-forgotten era. "Listen, I have this friend…"

{{{|

Rhys and Jack were sitting on the bleachers watching Ianto practice football, and for once he was showing aggression. "What did you do to him?"

"I didn't do anything." Jack protested, "Would've been to drunk to remember."

"But the plan was working."

"What do you care?" Jack tore his gaze away from Ianto to Rhys, "I thought you wanted out."

"Yeah, well, I did. But that was uh, before she kissed me." Rhys blushed.

"Where?" Jack grinned.

"In the car." It wasn't exactly the location he was looking for, but further questioning was interrupted by Tosh's arrival.

"Alright," She sat down beside Jack, "talked to him." She was mentioning her conversation with Tommy, Ianto's best friend.

"Wha'd he say?" Rhys asked.

Tosh frowned a bit, "Hates him with the fire of a thousand suns." She sighed, "That's a direct quote."

Jack ran his hand through his hair, "Thanks. That's very comforting."

"We don't know," Rhys protested, "He could just need a day to cool off."

Just then the football flew by their head, almost hitting Jack. As one they all turned to see Ianto glaring at them, definitely not robotic-like. Seems as if when he did let his emotions show they really took over.

"Maybe two."

{{{|

As Ianto and Tommy were walking around the Plass when he spotted a School Dance Poster. He glared at it and as he tore it down, muttering angrily. "Can you imagine who would go there?"

Tommy ducked his head, "I would. But I have no one to ask."

The Welshman responded sarcastically, "Do you really wanna get dressed up and listen to a band that by definition sucks?"

Tommy rolled his eyes, "Alright. Alright, we won't go. Not like I have a tux anyway."

"You're looking at this from entirely the wrong perspective." Ianto replied monotone, "We're making a statement."

Tommy replied sarcastically, "Oh yay, something different for us."

{{{|

Owen sought Gwen out. The plan was still on; and he'd just pay Jack to take Ianto to the prom. He grinned to himself as he walked up to Gwen, "Hey there, cupid."

"Can I help you?" Gwen glanced at him, not very impressed.

"I want to talk t you about the school dance." He tried to look his sexiest right then, right eyebrow twitch and pose.

Gwen sighed, "Look, you know the deal. I can't go if Ianto doesn't go."

"Your brother is going." Owen smirked.

Gwen's eyes grew, "Since when?" Surprise was clearly written on her face; she knew her brother hated the idea of the dance. He was often saying he would never go.

"Oh, let's just say I'm taking care of it." He replied airily as he walked off in search of Jack. It didn't take him long to find the American. "Jack." He greeted, holding out two hundred. "This should take care of the limo, the tux, everything. Just make sure he gets to the dance."

Jack glowered, "You know what? I'm sick of playing your little game." He found Ianto's emotions and he didn't much like the idea of toying around with them.

Owen shrugged, "You sick of, lets say, three hundred?" He took out more money and grinned when Jack, after a pause, took the money.

Jack searched for Ianto, and trying to make amends. He had looked all over the large school but it was a large one and he couldn't locate the other boy. After school though, he finally spotted Ianto's car and followed it. The pursuer gazed in through the window of a music store, watching Ianto play a guitar. With a look of longing the Welshman left, but not before Jack made a mental note of it. Next they went to a bookstore. Jack waited patiently until walking up to Ianto he asked, "Excuse me, have you seen _The Feminine Mystique?_ I've lost my copy." He flashed his most disarming smile.

"What are you doing here?" Ianto asked, not pleased to see Jack at all.

"I heard there was a poetry reading." Jack quipped.

"You're so-"

"Charming?" Jack supplied while Ianto turned and walked away, "Wholesome?" He continued.

Ianto turned around again, glaring at Jack, "Unwelcome."

Jack's brows knit together, "You're not as emotionless as you think you are."

"And you're not as sexy as you think you are." Ianto replied.

"Ooh someone still has their undies in a twist."

"Don't think for one second you had an effect whatsoever on my undies." Ianto shot out.

"Then what did I have an effect on?"

"Other than my upchuck reflex?" Ianto asked airly, "Nothing." Heading for the front door he paused, grabbing something off a shelf and thrusting it into Jack's hands: it was a copy of _The Feminine Mystique_ . in Jack's hands before disappearing.

Lunch the next day found Jack telling Toshiko and Rhys how much trouble he was having getting Ianto to agree to even talk to him. "You're right. He's still angry."

"Sweet love, renew thy force!" Rhys said a bit loudly and with a little too much enthusiasm.

Jack glared at Rhys, "Hey man! Don't say shit like that to me. People can hear you." He was known for being a flirt, he couldn't have the word 'love' be spread around. He had a reputation to uphold.

Tosh sighed, "Look, you embarrassed the boy. Sacrifice yourself on the altar of dignity and even the score."

Jack shook his head and standing up from their table and walking away, leaving his food untouched.

The two friends watched him go. and Rhys turned to Toshiko, "Listen. Don't say shit like that to him. People can hear you." They had no idea what the American was up to.

What they didn't know is that by talking to Jack about sacrificing himself on the alter of dignity he got an idea. He went out and searched for someone specific. After finding the other teenager, Jack handed over a wad of money and the two shared a smile.

{{{|

Jack watched the football team practice on the field for a few seconds before making some adjustments to the microphone of the announcer's box. Taking a breath he went and stood in the middle of the bleachers and began to sing, _"You're just to good to be true," _Everyone around stopped and looked towards him, _"Can't take my eyes off you," _He glanced down at Ianto and grinning, happy to see that Ianto was watching him, _"You'd be like Heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much."_ He hadn't moved from his spot, but his voice was gaining in confidence, _"At long last love has arrived, and I thank God I'm alive. You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off you."  
_

Jack then pointed to the man he had given the wad of money to earlier and the band who had been practicing formations started to play the music for the well known love song. Jack couldn't help but grin widely when he saw Ianto's surprised face. Beginning to dance around on the bleachers, Jack continued the song, _"I love you, baby, and if it's quite alright, I need you baby, to warm a lonely night."_ by now he saw two of the guards that kept the school more peaceful start towards him, _"Trust in me when I say:" _Jack grinned at them and maneuvered to evade them, _"Oh, pretty baby, don't bring me down, I pray. Oh pretty baby, now that I found you stay." _He ran past one of the guards and slapped him on the butt, getting a cheer from the crowd watching. Jack then turned and faced Ianto, closer to him now, at the bottom of the bleachers, _"And let me love you, baby. Let me love you."_ The crowd all clapped and cheered . Jack was too busy staring at a smiling Ianto to notice the guards come up behind him. He allowed the men to them escort him out but not before turning and winking at Ianto.

{{{|

Jack sat in detention staring out the window, ignoring Ms. Rose Tyler interrogating a kid who seemed to have some sort of drug on him. He was tapped his foot rapidly, hoping that Ianto would talk to him now. What bothered Jack most is that he really cared about what Ianto thought of him; that had never happened before. He'd never cared what people thought of him before. Jack sighed and leaned back in his chair.

Glancing at the door, he was surprised to see Ianto walk into the room and not pay any attention to Jack. Maybe his stunt hadn't worked after all... but why was Ianto interrupting detention?

Ianto greeted the woman. "Ms. Tyler, ma'am."

Jack rolled his eyes; of course Ianto was going to talk to Ms. Tyler, she was his football coach after all.

Coach Tyler responded. "What can I do for you Ianto?"

"I have some ideas on how to improve our football team."

"Great!" she responded excitedly, then dropped to her teacher voice, "Let's talk about it later." She of course was suggesting that they not talk about in the middle of detention.

As Rose turned away Ianto locked eyes with Jack and motioned to the window. Jack raised his eyebrows, not understanding what Ianto was pointing at. Ianto started whispering, "Window. Window."

Jack shrugged and Ianto rolled his eyes, "Window." He stated louder. Jack nodded, hearing the word.

Rose had heard it too and turned back to Ianto who put on a stoic mask. Ianto grabbed her arm and turned her away from the window as Jack stood up slowly, "As you know," Ianto addressed his coach, "we have a really big game with Skaro, the private school-" Jack ran to the side of the room and almost cursed as the floor squeaked, but Ianto grabbed Rose's arm again and started talking with hand gestures, "And they kick our butts every year. I was thinking. I devised a plan that will enable us to finally defeat them."

"Which is…" Rose was lead off, slightly interested.

"That thing you taught us."

"What thing?"

"Misdirection." Ianto said quickly.

"I taught you that?" She clearly didn't think she had.

"Yeah," Ianto's voice wavered a bit, "You are Siegfried, or Roy. Anyway, that's not important. The-" Ianto's eyes grew when Rose started to turn again,. He reached out and grabbed her chin to stop her, "Think about it. Um, they're looking left," he moved her head to the left, "and we're running right." He let go of her chin after he moved it right, "Bang. We score. We win."

Jack had yet to make it out the window, trying to stay quiet.

"Okay." Rose nodded, "But how to we get them to look left?"

"Um," Ianto thought desperately, eyes widening as Jack finally made it to the window noisily., "Like this!" He said loudly, grabbing Rose's face again and pressing their lips together. Giving this kiss all he could, he made sure she couldn't or wouldn't want to pull away and notice that Jack was missing. He glanced behind her while their lips were still touching and pulled back once Jack was gone. The classroom cheered - mostly excited to see that Ianto got Jack escaping, but also at the kiss. "Well," He tried to put his stoic mask on again, "Now that you've seen The Plan," He was walking backwards,

"I'm gonna go show The Plan to someone else." He turned and walked away as calmly as he could.

{{{|

Jack and Ianto strolled along down the street, having parked the car. and decided to take a stroll in town. It was a beautiful day and now that Jack was now out of detention. "I can't thank you enough for helping me sneak out of there. Very cool."

"No problem." Ianto replied.

"I thought for sure I was busted when I was climbing out that window. So, how did you keep her distracted?" Jack looked at Ianto.

"I dazzled her with," Ianto said, before adding quickly, "my wits."

They walked for a few seconds in quiet silence before Jack turned to Ianto, "What's your excuse?"

"For?"

"For acting the way you do." Ianto stopped walking and looked at Jack. Jack kept his face open, hoping that Ianto would tell him.

"Not keen on getting hurt again." Ianto replied after a pause.

"But not letting people in is probably hurting you more." Jack reached out and wrapped his arm around Ianto. "At least with getting to know people you have the good moments." He moved his hand down from around Ianto's shoulders to the other boy's hand and grabbed it. Jack smiled when Ianto didn't let go of his hand as they started walking again. After a length Jack asked, "You up for it?"

"Up for what?"

Jack motioned at a paint-ball game.

Soon they were outfitted in white jump suits with a few faded paint stains, clearly they bleached them when they got washed. Chasing each other they threw the paint-balls, hitting one another and missing at some times. Jack's aim seemed to be better but Ianto had the element of surprise, getting Jack and get him at close range. Eventually they had one ball each and were standing right in front of each other, grinning. Jack shrugged and threw his behind him, making Ianto grin more as he stepped closer to Jack. Jack reached around Ianto, pulling him towards him and the Welshman proceeded to put the paint-ball on Jack's head and he pressed the balloon onto Jack's head, making it burst. Jack laughed as the paint rolled down his head and letting go to of Ianto, chased the smaller man down. Jack gave chase and ended up catching him. The American grabbed him as they tumbled into some hay that lay on the course. Grinning Jack reached down with his hand and turned Ianto's face towards him, giving him the kiss that he hadn't the night of Mary's Party.

{{{|

"So who did it?" Jack asked as they walked up to Ianto's house.

"Did what?"

"Make you afraid of feeling?" He hoped Ianto trusted him enough to tell him.

After a moment's pause Ianto nodded, deciding to speak, "Well, a few things. Mostly Tad dying and Lisa leaving me for other men." He tilted his head, "How 'bout you? Why do you feel the need to have everyone love you?"

Jack responded with a smile. "Who doesn't want that?"

"Fine." Ianto rolled his eyes, "Okay. Is the accent real?"

"Yep." Jack nodded as the two of them sat down on the steps outside the house, "Lived there until I was thirteen." He paused, "So, you're mom is really-"

"My step-mam. Yes." Ianto said, "But my birth-mam died when I was young and Martha is the only Mam I really know." He shrugged, "Okay. Where were you last year? I know the porn career is a lie."

"Do you?" Jack asked with an eyebrow raise and a flirty tone.

They laughed for a bit at that until Ianto said, "Tell me something true."

"Something true?" Jack paused, thinking, "I hate peas."

Ianto rolled his eyes, "No. Something real. Something no one else knows."

"Okay." Jack leaned close and kissed Ianto's cheek, "You're sweet." He kissed Ianto's neck, right below the jaw now, "And sexy." He kissed lower on the neck again, "And completely hot for me."

Ianto raised his eyebrows and lightly hit Jack on the shoulder, "You're amazingly self-assured. Has anyone ever told you that?"

Jack grinned, "I tell myself that everyday, actually." He leaned close and quickly put a kiss on Ianto's lips, "Go to the dance with me."

"Is that a request or a command?" Ianto asked.

"C'mon. Go with me." Jack couldn't believe he was pleading.

"No." Ianto said with casual indifference.

"No? Why not?"

"No. I won't go with you."

"Why not?" Jack asked again.

Ianto leaned back, eyes cooler than a moment before, "Because I don't want to go. It's a stupid tradition."

"C'mon. People won't expect you to go." Trying to appeal to the man's anti-social side.

"Why are you pushing for this?" Ianto felt himself flush with anger. He had been doing so well, keeping his emotions under control and just to have Jack just pulled them out pull them back out, "What's in it for you?"

Jack felt guilty, like he was just accused of cheating on Ianto, "Oh, so now I need to have a motive to want to be with you?"

"You tell me."

"You need therapy, you know that?" Jack asked quickly and angrily, "Has anyone ever told you that?"

Ianto felt suspicious and a little hurt at Jack saying he needed help, "Just answer the question, Jack."

"Nothing!" Jack all but yelled in a fit of anger, "There is nothing in it for me. Just the pleasure of your company." He felt dirty for lying to Ianto, he could lie to most anyone but he had gotten to know the other boy and found himself liking what he saw.

Ianto glared and stood up, going inside the house and slamming the door behind him.

{{{|

Rhys was glad he still had French Lessons with Gwen, even though it seemed she was better than he was.

_"May I offer you a parsnip." _Rhys asked in French, reading the text from his book.

_"No, you may not." _Gwen said, not even looking at her book and staring out in front of her, bored.

_"Where is your uncle's pencil?" _Rhys asked, going with the book relentlessly.

_"I don't know. Perhaps it's up your arse?" _Gwen countered.

"Wait." Rhys said, flustered and turning pages in the book, having no idea what Gwen just said, "Wait a minute. That's not on this page."

_"Let me ask you a question, Rhys." _Gwen said in French, tone angry, _"When are you going to ask me out?"_ She got up and stormed off leaving Rhys at the table.

He flipped through his book, looking for a clue. After a few seconds looking he found a page that gave an idea on what she said, _"Shit."_

{{{|

Tommy opened his locker to find a suit that resembled those made in the 1920's along with a note.

"Hey Sugar. Join me at the dance and all that jazz. Love Louise Brooks."

He grinned to himself, happy to see he had someone to go to the dance with.

{{{|

Martha was on the deck of their house, working out on the equipment, working on keeping fit. Moving from doing sit-ups to a stretchy-arm-workout device she smiled when Gwen walked up to her. "Mam?"

"Hi honey."

"Um, I want to discuss tomorrow night with you." Gwen took a breath, "As you know, it's the dance-"

Martha had not been expecting that to come up in conversation and she accidentally let go the device, sending it flying away from their house. "The dance? Ianto has a date?"

"Well, no." Gwen said quietly.

"Don't think you're fooling me for a second." Martha said, hands on her hips, "I know who you want to bend the rules for. It's that Owen?" Gwen furrowed her eyebrows, an expression Martha mistook as affirmation. "If your brother's not going, you're not going. End of story."

"Okay. Let's review. Ianto: not interested. Me: dying to go." Gwen pleaded.

"Do you know what happens at dances?"

"Yes Mam." Gwen said patently, "We'll dance. We'll kiss. We'll come home. It's not the crisis situation you imagine."

"Kissing huh?" Martha asked, "That's what you think happens? Got news for you. Kissing isn't what keeps me up to my elbows in placenta all day long."

"Can we, for two seconds, ignore the fact that you are severely unhinged and discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy?"

"What's normal? All those kids on the shows sleeping in each other's beds and whatnot?"

"Mam, that's so not-" Gwen tried to tell Martha, only to be cut off.

"Got news for you, I know what it's like to be your age. Remember, I once was and I know how it goes." Gwen groaned and walked off just in time for the work-out device to come flying back.

{{{|

Gwen was laying on her bed, wishing she could go to the dance, when Ianto knocked on her door. "Come in."

"Listen," Ianto started, "I know you hate having to sit at home because I'm not Mr. Popular."

"Like you care." Gwen responded flatly.

"I do care." Ianto sat down beside Gwen, "But I'm a firm believer in doing something for your own reasons, and not someone else's."

"Well, I wish I had that luxury." Gwen bit out, "You know, I'm the only one in my class who got asked to go to the dance and I can't go, because you don't feel like it."

Ianto sighed and very hesitantly asked, "You don't know what Owen did, do you?"

Sitting up Gwen eyed her brother, "Wha'd he do?"

"It was when I was going out with Lisa." Ianto licked his lips, "You know I've said I won't date anyone who cheats, right?" Gwen nodded, "That's because Lisa was seeing other men behind my back."

"Well, yeah." Gwen stated, "She left you for that cyberman."

"No, you don't understand, Gwen." Ianto said, "Not talking to someone online and getting to know them, I mean Lisa had sex with others. Owen was her favorite. He knew she was in a relationship with me and he didn't care. He was dating Katie at the time as well."

"He what?"

"We were friends then." Ianto continued, "Owen and I. He knew that I was head over heels about Lisa and he was bored one day. Simply put they had sex. This went on for months before one day Owen decided to gloat."

"Oh, Ianto." Gwen said.

"I punched his lights out." Ianto said firmly.

"How come you didn't tell me about this?" Gwen asked, "We were close then."

"I wanted you to make up your own mind about him."

"Then why did you help Mam hold me hostage?" Gwen said angrily.

Ianto responded calmly, "I guess I thought I was protecting you. Didn't want your heart broken like mine had been."

"By not letting me experience anything myself?"

"Not all experiences are good, Gwen." Ianto stood up, "You can't always trust the people you want to."

"Well, I guess I'll never know, will I?" Gwen spat out as she rose to her feet and held the door open for Ianto, silently telling him he should leave.

Ianto left without a word and went to his room. Laying on his bed Ianto closed his eyes and thought.

{{{|

Martha was sat in the living room reading a magazine when she heard Ianto come down the stairs, "Bye Mam, I'm going to the dance."

If Martha had looked up at Ianto she would see that he was in a very fine tux that had clearly been tailored for him. Only she didn't and as she thought he was joking, "Funny, sweetie."

Gwen followed in a dress, her hair done up and heels on. Martha saw this right away and quickly put down her magazine and crossed the room to her, "What's that?"

"A dress for the dance." Gwen answered with a small smile.

Martha frowned. "I seem to be hearing that word a lot lately."

The doorbell rang, and Gwen opened the door revealing Rhys standing in the doorway looking sharp in a tux of his own. He grinned and as he looked Gwen up and down. "Wow. I um- wow."

Gwen smiled, pleased by the speechless reaction she had received. "Bye Mam."

"Stop." Martha commanded, giving the teens pause. "Turn. Explain."

Gwen looked serious, ready to explain how she was able to go to the dance. "Okay, remember how you said I could date if Ianto dated? Well, he found this guy," she didn't notice Martha raising and eyebrow, "who's actually kinda perfect for him. Which is actually kinda perfect for me, because Rhys," she glanced and grinned at the boy, "asked me to go to the dance, and I really, really, really wanna go. And since Ianto went, I guess I'm allowed to, based on the aforementioned rule, and it's previous stipulations, of course." When Gwen was done with that she had put her serious face back on for a second before turning to Rhys with a large smile on her face, "Let's go."


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: Standard still applies.  
A/N: Here we are, the last chapter. Thanks for reading this and having fun with it.**

Chapter Six

Ianto was stood beside the doors to the dance, waiting for Jack to show up. He was surprised to hear that the band wasn't that terrible. "Wow." Ianto turned and found Jack staring at him with a grin on his face.

"You too." Ianto replied. "Where'd you get the tux at the last minute?"

"Oh, just something I had." Jack said airily, "You know, lying around. Where'd you get your tux?"

"Oh, just something I had." Ianto repeated Jack's line, "You know, lying around." He paused, "Listen. I'm really sorry I questioned your motives. I was wrong."

"You're forgiven." Jack kissed Ianto on the forehead, "Okay. Ready for the dance?"

"Yes sir."

{{{|

Owen thought he looked divine. He wore the nicest tux he could afford and had a white scarf that set off the black. Walking up to the Jones' house he knocked and waited.

Martha opened the door and raised an eyebrow.

"Hello Ms. Jones. I'm here to pick up Gwen." Owen informed her.

Martha's eyes narrowed a bit and she slammed the door in his face.

{{{|

Jack and Ianto entered the dance floor. and Ianto couldn't help but grin when he saw Gwen dancing with Rhys. From what he'd seen of the other boy he was a nice kid. Good for Gwen, Ianto thought. To Ianto it seemed as if his intentions were pure, purer then Owen's.

Tommy came up then, in his tux that looked like it came from the 1920's. "Have you seen her?"

"Seen who?" Ianto asked.

"Louise." Tommy said, looking around, "Louise Brooks. She said she'd meet me here."

"Oh Tommy. Please tell you haven't progressed to full-on hallucinations."

Jack looked around and saw Toshiko on the stage. Catching Tommy's attention he nodded towards her.

Turning he spotted her and saw Tosh dressed as a 1920's flapper girl. He grinned and walked up to her as she came down and met him. from the stage. Greeting her the two went off to dance.

Later on in the night Gwen was in the restroom, checking her make-up and hair in the mirror when Diane walked in. Staring, Gwen was surprised, "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, you don't think you were the only one in our class at the dance?" Diane asked, aloof, "Owen just picked me up."

"Well congratulations." Gwen responded honestly, "He's all yours."

"Very generous princess." Diane replied, "And just so you know, Owen only liked you for one reason. He even had a bet going on with his friends. He was gonna nail you tonight."

{{{|

Jack and Ianto were dancing when Jack suddenly said, "Milwaukee."

"What?"

"Milwaukee, Wisconsin." Jack started, "That's where I was last year. I wasn't in jail, I don't know Marilyn Manson, and I didn't sleep with a Spice Girl - I don't think. You see, my grandpa, he was ill, so I spent most of the year sitting on his couch watching The Price is Right and eating microwave soups." He grinned, "End of story."

Ianto laughed but the laughter was short lived; Owen grabbed Jack and started yelling. "Hey! What's Gwen doing here with that cheese dick? I didn't pay you to take out Ianto so that little punk could snake me with Gwen."

Jack stared at Ianto and was horrified to see a look of hurt followed by his stoic wall going up, "Nothing in it for you, huh?" He turned and stalked out. Jack ignored Owen as he rushed out after the hurt man.

Toshiko and Tommy, having seen it all of that go down, they rushed over to Rhys and Gwen, "The shit has hit the fan." She frowned and pointed over to where Owen,seeing Jack pursue the retreating Welshman.

Tosh and Rhys walked over to Owen, "Owen, pal, comrade." Tosh started, "Listen-"

Owen pushed her down and Rhys went to help her up when Owen started talking, "You messed with the wrong guy, and now you're gonna pay. You, and that little bitch."

Rhys turned and glared at Owen, not liking the sound of all that. "Alright, that's enough! Okay? You crossed the line."

Owen punched Rhys in the face, making the boy fall down on the ground, "Oh come on! Get up, you little punk." He turned when he felt a tap on his shoulder. Owen had time to see Gwen's fist aimed for his face. He covered his nose with his hands, "Shit Gwen! I'm shooting a nose spray ad tomorrow!"

"That's for making my date bleed." Gwen punched him again, "That's for my brother." She kneed him in the crotch, making Owen fall to the floor, "And that's for me." She and Tommy helped their respective dates up. "Are you okay?"

Rhys smiled, "Never been better."

{{{|

Ianto was almost at the door when Jack caught up to him, "Would you give me a chance?"

"You were paid to take me out!" Ianto turned on Jack, "By the one person I truly hate. I knew this was a set-up."

"Ianto, it wasn't like that, okay?" Jack protested.

"Really?" Ianto asked skeptically, "What was it like? A down payment now and a bonus for sleeping with me?"

"No," Jack said, "I didn't care about the money, okay? I cared," he swallowed, "I cared about you."

Ianto couldn't help but look at Jack in both sadness and anger. He should have known it was too good. "You are so not who I thought you were."

Jack reached out and grabbed Ianto, giving him a kiss and trying to convince the Welshman that he did care. Ianto quickly backed away and ran out the door.

Gwen joined Jack, watching as her brother run away, frowning. She'd been glad to see her brother seem happy and was glad that she had helped but now she was anything but.

{{{|

The next morning Gwen stepped out onto the front porch to see Ianto sitting, doodling in a sketch book. "You sure you don't want to go sailing with us? It'll be fun."

"No, I'm fine."

"Look." Gwen said, wanting to cheer her brother up some, "I don't know if I ever thanked you for going last night, but it really meant a lot to me."

"I'm glad."

At that moment Rhys walked up and the pair ran out to the car. As they walked Rhys asked, "Is he okay?"

Gwen glanced back quickly, "I hope so."

Martha walked out and stood next to him, watching the car drive off, "Where's your sister going?"

"She's meeting some bikers." he responded sarcastically, "Big ones. Full of sperm."

"Funny." Martha replied, clearly not amused, "So, tell me about this dance. Was it fun?"

"Parts of it."

"Which parts?" She asked, sitting down next to him.

"The part where Gwen beat the hell out of some guy." He smiled faintly, remembering the scene fondly.

Martha's eyebrows rose in surprise. "Gwen did what?" .

"What's the matter?" Ianto asked.

"I'm impressed." Martha started, "You know, parents don't like to admit it when their kids are capable of running their own lives. It means we've become spectators. Gwen still lets me play a few innings. You've had me on the bench for years. And when you go to Canary Wharf, I won't even be able to watch the game."

It was Ianto's turn to raise his eyebrows, "When I go?"

"Don't tell me you've changed your mind. I've already sent them the money." grinning, he gave Martha a hug.

{{{|

The Doctor faced his class, "All right. I assume everyone found time to complete their poem. Except for Owen," The class turned to look at the boy who sulked in the back, hiding behind his shades., "who has an excuse. Hey, glasses off." Owen slowly took off the tinted glasses revealing two black eyes and a swollen nose. "Alright." The Doctor addressed the class, "Anyone brave enough to read theirs aloud?"

No one moved for a short time. Ianto slowly raised his hand, "I will."

Jack looked up, surprised.

Ianto stood in front of his class and took a breath before starting.

"I hate the way you talk to me

And I hate the way you cut your hair.

I hate the way you drive my car.

I hate it when you stare.

I hate your big dumb combat boots

And the way you read my mind.

I hate you so hard it makes me sick.

It even makes me rhyme.

I hate the way you're always right.

I hate it when you lie.

I hate it when you make me laugh;

Even worse when you make me cry.

I hate it when you're not around

And the fact that you didn't call,

But mostly I hate that I don't hate you;

Not even close;

Not even a little bit;

Not even at all."

Ianto glanced at Jack, their eyes connecting before he walked out of the classroom.

{{{|

Ianto walked alone to his car. As he came closer his brows knit together and then raised in surprise. Reaching in through his car window he picked up a Fender Stratocaster guitar.

"Nice huh?" Jack asked from behind.

The Welshman turned around and smiled slightly, "A Fender Strat? Is this for me?"

"Yeah. I thought you could use it. You know, when you start a band." Jack started, "Besides, I had some extra cash, you know. Some asshole paid me to take out a really great guy."

Ianto smiled, "Is that right?"

"Yeah, but I screwed up. I fell for him." Ianto blushed as Jack leaned in to kiss him. Ianto let him but broke it off suddenly.

"You can't just buy me a guitar every time you screw up, you know." He informed Jack.

The American nodded, "Yeah, I know. But then, you know, there's always drums and bass and maybe even one day a tambourine." He attempted to kiss the younger man again, only to be interrupted.

"And don't just think you can-" Ianto protested.

Jack kissed him again and didn't let the kiss end.


End file.
